Feeling terrible for many.. But the main might be you are really no longer there.. Am i really forgotten? I keep thinking everyone has changed during this few months.. Never thought that i would, too.
I think we can really survive without each other, just that the memories is killing me.. Everything i see can reminds of you..
I don't think i have grown mature but I'm just hiding away my emotions and keeping quiet.. Maybe my quietness makes me look grown.. I knew i would suffer when i bottled up things.. But i really can't force it out of my mouth. My old ways of making me feel better doesn't work now. I don't want to become like this.. & definitely don't want anyone to concern about me.. I get very fed up with myself for not speaking up..
Today at tiong celebrated Pei Qi birthday.. Just wanna say I'm really sorry.. Don't know what went into me causing me as a 'turn off' to you guys.. Should have not present in the first place.. How i wished no one would spot me in a corner.. To speak frankly, i don't enjoy myself there because I'm spoiling the atmosphere..
Wishing that I'm off later, i just wanna be at a place where there's just me at the moment.
Did not went home straight after the party.. I'm really feeling crappy about life.. Went to a place where it's dangerous, yet quiet(but not very).. Pretty thanks to the 4 stranger who waste their petrol on me. Lol..
If there's a button on me, i would want the function of shutting down me.. No kidding.
Pulling myself out of this shit..
Clkl
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